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IBetween writing Bond novels and churning out vodka martinis, Ian Fleming had Caribbean coast views to watch The golden eye. David Hockney has settled in the Hollywood Hills, Bridlington and Normandy, never without a pack of cigarettes or more recently an iPad.
Andy Zaltzman is on the roof at the bottom of his garden in Streatham, South London, where the phone signal is shit but its wifi is pretty good. It’s not Malibu or Jamaica, but it’s a pretty nice place where he can plunge down with his two pieces of music: statistics and satire.
Zaltzman has been a comedian for over 20 years: critically acclaimed plays in Edinburgh and on the track, a creative partnership between John Oliver and Bugle podcast, a weekly explosion of high-end caliber satirical Hogwarts that has been going on since 2008. He secured the only hosting assignments in Radio 4s The News Quiz in 2020 with a Covid lock he had hosted for his own protection and not from the studio. When he doesn’t walk through the news from his garden spot, he infiltrates his other passion: cricket.
Zaltzman has been obsessed with cricket since he was a child, and his love for it takes him deeper into the depths where he now lives, swimming among the statistics. He wasn’t a youth number tip, so I did math A-level, but I don’t remember anything about it and he studied classics at university. Does he have some kind of numerical epiphany?
I was given a couple of books after the 1981 ashes. They had Bill Frindalls ’TMS scorecards in when the magic cricket statistics hatch opened and I fell.
His statistical interest blurred in the back burner as his comedy career set in motion. He was then invited to write a cricket blog for ESPNcricinfo, which he called Chocolate cake. I started to delve into the numbers using their statsguru device. Perhaps the combination of statistics and comedy made it quite distinctive.
A few years later, the Test Match Special played. Hed has been a lifelong successor. I remember listening in the car when India won the 1983 World Cup, and when Richard Ellison tore through Australia in 1985, which was especially exciting as Kent fans.
It is this enthusiasm and killer eye for status that has made him a popular addition to the facility. His first change Frindall, Sampson, etc. were particularly memorable. It was the morning after the Brexit vote, a one-day person at Edgbaston. Id had been watching the news all night while looking for statistics on visiting Sri Lankans and testing my scoring system. I was definitely nervous, it felt like I was making my debut.
His first test match behind the microphone was equally chaotic. I got a call around 9 in the morning of the game after Andrew Sampson had called sick. I had to play Authors XI and I had to be the guy who drops at the last minute. I didn’t have time to prepare, I just had to do it.
Is he behind the comedy, Does he feel like a TMS scorer / statistician flashlight wearer or does he offer something different? A little of both. I try to find things that help illustrate and explain what’s going on in the game and what might happen later, to support commentators as they tell the story of the game as it evolves.
It’s about a general report instead of just picking up the weird numbers that cause that meaning. The best statistics are the ones that spark discussion and give an idea of the performance of the game or show trends. I’m there to provoke a little discussion, it’s a real pleasure.
What about delivery? Is status delivery similar to a joke? The explanation of clarity is, of course, crucial and it is important to provide some kind of context when needed. Similarly, in a comedy routine, a lack of clarity and precision can weaken audience reaction.
Zaltzman quickly laughs at himself and his unique appearance (like a kind of Side view Bob Willis) along with his razor blade gives the impression of a man who would be as happy to fool around on stage as communicating with a spreadsheet program or through a rifle Almanack. He admits so much. I make my dreams come true.
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One subject attracts his laser beam anger. I’ve always been skeptical of a hundred concepts. My biggest problem is that in trying to create a supposedly simpler version of cricket, they’ve made it harder to explain the game.
Most cricket lovers are drawn to the game by people who love it and explain it to parents, family members, friends, or TV and radio commentators. I’m afraid a hundred people may find it harder to explain, convey their love for the game.
Zaltzman is coming out in the long run now, the new form gets a kind of deletion that is usually reserved for the most inefficient or hypocritical MP. The lack of custodians seems to be a little alarming at how great cricket as a sport is. The philosophy behind Hundred seems to see the complexity of cricket as a disadvantage and not as one of its greatest strengths.
My children are 14 and 12 years old, and the video games they and their friends enjoy are the most complex and require considerable time. Many successful children’s book series are long, multi-layered epics. Look at the TV trend, elongated series with deep and complex aspects that don’t patronize the audience but challenge them. Test cricket is like the final set of boxes.
We spend over an hour discussing all aspects of cricket, from the theory that Tim Bresnan can be seen as a micro-Bothami, to how the Ian Bells 2013 Ashes series could be one of the most influential of all players despite never being awarded a match. He’s currently working on some things related to disintegrating averages (no, neither of me).
I could talk about this all day, Zaltzman says with a laugh, which is convenient because I literally have to do it.
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Sources 2/ https://www.theguardian.com/sport/2021/jun/29/its-my-dream-job-andy-zaltzman-on-being-crickets-funniest-statistician The mention sources can contact us to remove/changing this article |
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