How can elite artists overcome relentless criticism and find strength?

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When it comes to how we approach mental health and self-care issues, we’ve certainly come a long way … but much of this progress is focused on ordinary people. We know more about the impact of stress and trauma on doctors, office workers, and teachers, and we’ve adjusted our reactions and language accordingly.

But we don’t often think about the unique challenges faced by actors, musicians, elite athletes and other artists who live their entire lives in the limelight. These people are rich, famous and are supposed to have it all… but they can face crippling anxiety, stress, doubt, rejection, even self-sabotage. In fact, many performers grapple with a host of mental health pressures only associated with being at the top of their profession.

Consider this: Many actors have to dig the dark depths of their own souls to bring authenticity to their roles… and can still come up against lukewarm or dismissive reviews. Athletes are completely dedicated to their sport, but can face angry derision if their performances somehow fail or their teammates fail to rally. Dancers, singers and other artists are constantly expected to devote themselves to the most vulnerable in their work, but fans feel perfectly free to toss the resulting art on social media.

Top performers of all types walk a perilous tightrope between giving everything to their job and jeopardizing their sanity. They balance creating unforgettable art with maintaining their personal well-being. To be famous is to be criticized. To be an interpreter is to learn to live with rejection.

How they keep their sanity intact is a mystery to many… but not to me. As a coach who helps elite actors, musicians and athletes face life’s challenges in the public eye, I have seen how performers learn to deal with the negativity of casting directors, peers, producers and the public. Not to mention themselves! And to illustrate just how resilient these gifted people can be, I interviewed seven prominent artists and performers about their experiences with criticism – both internal and external – and how they kept it from impacting their lives. Mental Health. The ideas they shared confirmed much of what I already knew to be true.

Professionally vulnerable

Not only do performers operate in very demanding and highly visible industries with unique pressures, they are often naturally empathetic and emotionally sensitive individuals. This is what makes them so strong in creating evocative art … but it is also what makes them vulnerable to the relentless rejection and negativity that accompanies their calling.

“We are naturally more sensitive creatures, we artists,” says actress, dancer and singer Emilia McCarthy. “So it’s interesting that we are the ones who put us in the most vulnerable profession. We ask the actors to do the craziest things. I don’t think there is really another profession, where you are asked to be so vulnerable in front of an audience of people.

McCarthy told me that she has seen coworkers whose depression and anxiety have been relentlessly triggered by pressures from the theater industry, and that dealing with rejection can take a toll on their mental health. Daniella Monet, actress and founder of Kinder Beauty Box, agrees that giving your best performance and being rejected can be overwhelming.

“I have not always been very good [coping with rejection]. When I was younger it was much more difficult and it manifested in various ways, ”explains Monet. “My mental health was not great. I struggled in school. I was young and a little too thin. I cared about what I was doing and wanted to win. So every time a door closed on me it hurt and I took it personally.

Since I want my clients to thrive at the highest level, create their most authentic and deepest work, and find lasting fulfillment, I urge them to acclimatize to constant feedback. Performers will never exist in a vacuum, and learning to deal with the feedback they inevitably receive, both positive and negative, is an extremely important coping mechanism. Even just getting used to being observed and seen is a skill worth cultivating.

“You get this crazy extra-perceptual thing based on the people watching you and your performance,” says former extreme sports athlete Jeff Lavin. “Eventually you get into the athletic state where you see how other people see you.”

There is no doubt that criticism, rejection and endless scrutiny is taking its toll. But performers are becoming increasingly savvy in managing their mental health in the face of these negative energies.

Be yourself, protect yourself

Singer-songwriter Olivia King has had her fair share of criticism and disappointment. From fan comments to canceled recording deals, she has faced a whole range of invalids. But, as she told me, she learned to ride the waves in her own way.

“I got to a point where I hate showing my music to people before I release it because someone might hate it and someone might like it, and then I start to doubt myself,” King says. “So I started to focus, do my thing and let go. If you like it, great. If you don’t, you don’t. People just have different opinions about it. It’s so subjective.

It took a lot of soul-searching to realize that she didn’t need to share her new songs until they were released to the public, but now that she knows it, King has fully regained confidence in she.

As a film and television actor, Bill Oberst Jr. may not have to face criticism before his work is released, but he does face another tough opponent: social media. Oberst has worked hard to root himself in self-acceptance and wisdom, but ten minutes on Twitter can erode that confidence.

“Suddenly, you are connected to 100,000 people following you and waiting for you to say things. Invariably, out of 100,000 people, you will have 2,000 who will comment negatively on what you say and separate it, ”he says. “It makes you want to say nothing. “

He admits he’s often tempted to overreact to goads online, but has found his personal key to dealing with negativity: a combination of detachment and empathy.

“The easy familiarity with which we launch insults virtually is very human, but it can be very damaging if we do not realize that in the end, it is not real! said Oberst. “You realize we’re all kids, and that’s just another sandbox. “

Actress Kelly Rutherford deals with rejection and criticism by redirecting her focus. Over time, she realized that living in the negative only creates more negativity, but the reverse can also be true. Rutherford shapes his reality by uplifting the positive in his life.

“Now I focus on what I wanted to create, instead of talking and continually focusing on the issues,” she says. It was a huge change. “

Dee Wallace, whose acting career spans decades, agrees that the key to living with criticism and scrutiny is mindfulness and authenticity. That making choices around the way you think and feel can completely transform your experience of the artistic professions.

“It’s so important that you choose to define yourself,” Wallace insists. “It’s not about what someone else thinks of you. You have to say, “This is who I am. “

As a former elite international rider myself, I am no stranger to the unique spotlight and pressures faced by those who move up the upper echelons of their profession. But I was very grateful to these successful creatives for sharing their tactics and ideas with me. Performers tend to look inward when we feel distressed… but it’s clear that we can learn a lot from each other about how to protect our boundaries and access our confidence in the face of a crisis. difficult and trying industry.

If you are an artist or an athlete and would like tailor-made advice, do not hesitate to contact me! Through my own experience living in this space, I have become a world class trainer for professional performers, artists, actors and creatives. My methods go far beyond simple performance coaching; I use the Claim Your Shine modality to help highly sensitive artists looking for deep personal development to live a life marked by both massive professional impact AND lasting fulfillment.

Written by Cathy Spaas.

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