Dakota Johnson Jokes About Armie Hammer Abuse Allegations

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Dakota Johnson and Armie Hammer. Photo-Illustration: Vulture. Photos: Getty Images

Dakota Johnson, who once spoke truth to power (That’s not true, Ellen.), indirectly tearing down a daytime entertainment empire, is now making jokes about Armie Hammers’ cannibalism allegations. Unfortunately, I was not in [Call Me by Your Name]. Luca had asked me to play the role of the peach, but our schedules conflicted, she said in a speech presenting Luca Guadagnino with the award for international icon at the opening gala of the film festival in Sundance, referring to his gay coming-of-age romance that debuted at the festival five years ago, starring Hammer and Timothe Chalamet. Thank goodness, because then I would have been another woman that Armie Hammer tried to eat. Everyone knows Oliver doesn’t bite the peach in the movie like he does in the book, but we digress.

Dakota Johnson Jokes That She Wasn’t Cast For #CallMeByYourName: Luca had asked me to play the fishing role, but our schedules conflicted. Thank goodness, because then I would have been another woman that Armie Hammer tried to eat. pic.twitter.com/9RZqeu4SCN

— Variety (@Variety) January 20, 2023

Whoever wrote Johnson’s remarks may have forgotten that the Lost Daughter and Fifty Shades star previously defended his former co-star Armie Hammer (as well as fellow former co-stars Shia LaBeouf and Johnny Depp) against culture. ‘cancelation. I had an amazing time working with them; I’m sad for the loss of great artists, she told The Hollywood Reporter in 2021. For some, the cannibalism(?) dig landed a bit awkwardly. For the filmmakers and lovers in the room, however, the joke was first met with laughter and then thunderous applause. Who knew cannibalism was so popular? She has finished. Whatever the manager of Blue Bottle Coffee meant by the joke, we probably won’t see its Ellen-style ramifications until the next Sundance, when one of those independent bigwigs will inevitably try to buy out Hammer after the Cayman Island clipping. Thank you very much Dakota.

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